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February 9, 2009

Slice of Life in Transit

I call this: On the Road Again — Posted by KP @ 7:32 pm

The crew bus rolls along a narrow deserted highway somewhere between Kentucky and Missouri.  The drive has become so boring that many of us have gone to our bunks because there’s nothing else to do.

I have the lights out and am lying down with my eyes closed but not really trying to sleep.  After about 15 minutes I feel the bus start to slow, then make a sharp turn, then another, and finally we seem to have stopped (though the ride is so smooth, at low speeds it can actually be hard to tell).  I suspect that our quest to find Mexican food for dinner has come to an end.   At the very least, I have learned that these sensations generally indicate we are stopping.

I slide my bunk curtain partially open and stick my head out, just as Bart steps into the open doorway of the driver’s compartment and exclaims, “El Bracero!”  I flip my legs out of the bunk, and immediately Nick slides his curtain open across from me and asks, “Are we somewhere?”  I say, “Yes.”  And so we all gather in the front lounge, getting shoes on and tidying ourselves, and together head out to dinner.


December 22, 2008

Random Note of the Day 2

I call this: On the Road Again — Posted by KP @ 8:03 pm

K[elley] + G[eorgia] act like horses


December 21, 2008

New Feature: Random Note of the Day

I call this: On the Road Again — Posted by KP @ 5:30 pm

I have an idea for a new feature: I will pick one note that I write every day (either in the blocking book or elsewhere) to highlight what’s going on with the show.

Today’s Note:
[Line] 2063 – Blows giant tuba


December 7, 2008

Washington

I call this: On the Road Again — Posted by KP @ 11:20 am

One of the nicest things that can happen to a company, especially one that has to coexist in tight quarters for six months, is to begin to develop some sort of company identity, and this usually starts with references and jokes that arise out of the rehearsal process.

If you haven’t read my previous posts, The Spy is a new play adapted from the 1821 novel of the same name, by James Fenimore Cooper (better known as the author of The Last of the Mohicans).  If you’d like to read it, check out this link.  I’ve never actually used Google Books before, but it looks pretty cool.  Should I ever find time to read it myself, that’s probably where I’ll go (although I have recently downloaded Stanza for the iPhone, which also has it).  The story takes place during the American revolution, and suffice it to say George Washington plays a prominent part in it.

About a week or so into rehearsals, this YouTube video was sent to everyone on the cast email list, and it immediately became the defining theme of The Spy rehearsal process.

I have taken a number of still images from the video and saved them for use on our signage.  So far I’ve only used them for our dressing room signs, an example of which you can see below.


July 25, 2008

No Pressure

I call this: summer stock,theatre — Posted by KP @ 5:52 pm

In every rehearsal for the principals of No, No, Nanette we have:
1. The Mayor of the city
2. A Tony winner
3. A retired English teacher
4. A retired history teacher

So we’ve got an expert for everything!


June 17, 2008

A Quick Observation on Technology

I call this: mac — Posted by KP @ 6:10 am

As I pack my bag for a day trip to Maine, I thought of something. My car. Here is my car of the moment, a ’08 Chevy Aveo, which I love despite the fact that it’s got absolutely manual everything. In past years my cars have had CD players, sunroofs, power locks and windows, and that little remote to lock and unlock the car. But none of them made me as happy as the little baby blue ’05 Aveo I had my first year at Reagle.

The Aveo comes with a key. That’s it. You get a key. You want in, use a key. You want to lock it, close the door and use the key, because obviously Enterprise doesn’t want to come picking you up when you lock your keys inside, so it’s very difficult to do that.

So to cut to the chase, I’m packing for the day. I’ve been driven to Ogunquit before, but never done the drive myself, so I was going to use the GPS on my phone (AT&T Tilt, for the next however-many-days until the 3G iPhone comes out). But I thought of how long I’ll be gone and worried that an hour and a half of GPS could kill my battery before the end of the day. If only I had a phone charger in the car. My previous few rental cars, which were of a higher class, had AC outlets in the car, which was awesome. The Aveo has a cigarette lighter. No way I’m buying a car charger for a phone I intend to use for less than a month, when I don’t even own a car to begin with. I really don’t understand why any car would still feature a cigarette lighter and not an AC outlet these days. Less people smoke, more people need gadgets in their cars. Why, Chevy, why?

I said to myself, “It’s 2008, why do I need to power my phone off the cigarette lighter?” Then I realized it’s 2008 and to get the window open I need to contort my arm and roll a little crank down. To open the door for a passenger I need to unbuckle myself and launch myself across the car to pull up the lock. Why should I be upset that I can’t plug in my phone? But then I packed the other gadget I was bringing — my iPod. For whatever reason, this car has a crank to roll down the window, no CD player, no tape deck or anything that could be considered a “feature” other than four wheels and an engine, but has a jack in its bare-bones radio for an iPod. Sure it’s for whatever audio device you choose to plug in, but let’s be honest, it wasn’t added to the design specs for an iRiver whatever, it’s for an iPod. Thus proving that the iPod is a more culturally important invention than apparently power windows, doors, alternating current and the compact disc.


April 28, 2008

Thank You, Bootleggers

I call this: theatre — Posted by KP @ 8:25 pm

I have two things to tell you:
The first begins in the stage management office of The Phantom of the Opera, a few short hours ago. We were talking about songs about months of the year, which after exhausting May, led to June, which of course led to “June is Bustin’ Out All Over.” This subject invariably leads to someone mentioning the infamous clip of Leslie Uggams performing said song at some event in Washington, DC and completely and utterly going up on the lyrics. It’s one of the most famous theatre-related moving pictures ever, it seems. We all got a good laugh just at the thought of it, so I swung around in my chair and headed over to YouTube so we could all enjoy it. But IT’S GONE!!! We searched under several different names and phrases. We did a Google search, which only led to broken links of YouTube videos that have been removed. If anyone reading this can point me to a working link for this video, many people in the Phantom company will be grateful. Bonus points if it’s the one with the subtitles speculating on what she might be trying to say.

After our disappointing failure, someone who had popped their head in at the prospect of seeing Leslie Uggams mentioned that on YouTube there was allegedly a video of the performance of Phantom where a certain Joseph Buquet had missed his entrance in “Magical Lasso”, and Meg (Heather McFadden) jumped up and sang the whole song. We found it quickly, and soon the halls of the Majestic were echoing with screams, laughter, and applause at this miraculously preserved moment in theatre history. Embedding is disabled so you will have to click the link to go directly to the page, but it’s well worth it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrzAKtZxK44

Heather is my new hero. Sally Williams is the Madame Giry, who is mostly holding herself together, even under the scrutiny of a close-up.


March 4, 2008

My Manifesto as Emperor of New York

I call this: random — Posted by KP @ 1:28 pm

Preamble
Whereas I have been called out (again!) for not updating this blog, I am going to make a slight departure from the usual topics to share with you my plans for the City of New York after I am declared Emperor.

And whereas these plans have been years in the making, and I have finally felt the need to write them down, and also to make a blog post, Behold!

I. Terraforming of Annoying Geography
For my first act as Emperor, I shall assemble a vast quantity of dynamite and bulldozers and other necessary equipment, and flatten the terrain of Washington Heights. This will no doubt require the destruction of many structures, probably including the one in which I currently reside, but in the end the benefits will outweigh the temporary displacement, and I will have long since moved into my palace above the Bed Bath and Beyond in Chelsea. It is unclear why this couldn’t have been done a hundred years ago before there was all this stuff here, but it might as well be done sooner rather than later. In the interests of historical preservation, the Cloisters can be left where they are up on a cliff of some sort, and people can continue to use the A train elevator to get there.

When this important work is completed, some slight modification of the valley in the vicinity of 125th St. can also be looked at.

II. Provision of Necessary Amenities for the Populace
1. It shall be required by law that there be a 24-hour Duane Reade located within 10 blocks of every point in the City.

2. Likewise there shall be a Staples with copy center within 10 blocks of every space licensed for public performance within the City. At least one of these shall be open 24 hours.

3. There shall be a Starbucks within 3 blocks of every point in the City. It may surprise some citizens to know that this has not yet been achieved.

4. Every mobile phone operator who wishes to do business in New York shall ensure that the entire City is covered with adequate voice and high-speed data service down to the first basement level, as well as all subway stations and tunnels. For any area of the city found to be not so covered, the company shall incur a fine of 100 million dollars per week that the lack of coverage exists, or $600,000 per hour in the case of temporary outages, the time being rounded up to the next hour.

5. Time Warner or another provider shall offer internet at a bandwidth of no less than 7 Mbps to every business and residence in the City. Fines for outages shall be $1,000 per minute per customer.

III. Transportation
1. Subways. It was the intention of the designers of the original subway system in 1904 that trains would run every 90 seconds. My first goal for the transit system is to return all lines to this operating procedure. This will not apply only to weekdays or so-called “business hours,” but to all hours, as the nighttime and weekend worker and the drunk returning home from the bar at 4AM are entitled to the same service as the businessman traveling to his office at 9AM.

The 2nd Avenue Subway shall be completed with all possible haste. As this will still leave the Upper East Side largely useless, a crosstown subway shall be constructed at 125th St.

2. Buses. The provision of bus lines and bus stops is deemed to be adequate, however the number of buses running on each line shall be greatly increased.

3. Vehicles neglecting to activate their turn signals may be physically damaged in any way deemed appropriate by passing pedestrians without fear of prosecution.

IV. The Bubble
Once the land has been sufficiently terraformed and the needs of the people provided for, we may begin construction on the true purpose of my Empire — to construct a bubble over the City of New York so that the extreme inconvenience of precipitation may be avoided. Depending on its design it may also allow for some degree of temperature control.

This bubble does not need to completely enclose the city — it may be open on the sides to allow fresh air and clear views. In effect it shall act as more of a “rain hat” over the City. Job placement assistance and educational opportunities shall be provided for the guys who stand on the street corner saying “Umbrellaumbrellaumbrella.” Once the City is free from precipitation, my primary aims as Emperor will be complete.

Other Public Works
A bridge system shall be constructed above the Times Square district, consisting of glass walkways which may be accessed at street corners by means of a card system similar to a Metrocard. Such cards shall be provided without cost to all residents of New York and commuting workers so that they may travel through the Times Square area in a rapid manner while allowing visitors to stare at the tall buildings and have their portraits drawn by sidewalk artists.

In Conclusion
I hope I have made it clear why it is in the best interets of all New Yorkers that I be declared Emperor and that all citizens should cooperate fully with my regime.


September 6, 2007

Why Phantom will Run Forever

I call this: theatre — Posted by KP @ 10:29 am

OK, I figured it out. Go with me on this:
I was thinking this morning about my new job, and how I will consider myself lucky if it even opens. This is not because I think it’s going to be a bad show or anything, it’s just the way my career has always gone. Some people have problems where their shows never run long. My problem is that whenever I get an open-ended run, it doesn’t just flop, it goes catastrophically bad from the moment I get the job. There was my first open-ended Off-Broadway contract where the show cut down to a 3-shows-per-week schedule on the week my contract started, and was closed nine performances later. Then there was the Broadway-bound play that was canceled before it even started rehearsal. If Frankenstein makes it through the first week of rehearsal, it will be the most successful open run I’ve ever had.

That’s just the background. So how does this relate to Phantom‘s run? I was saying to myself today, “Why can’t anything I do have a decent run?” Then of course I had to admit, “Well, except Phantom.” That’s when it hit me. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard someone say, “Man, every show that so-and-so does flops! Well, except Phantom.”

No one can explain why Phantom keeps running, in fact running so well that it’s keeping pace with every show except Wicked and Jersey Boys. They were talking privately about closing it just a few years ago, and here we are. Where does it get such good fortune? Obviously it’s leeching off all the good show karma of everyone who works on it, and when they go elsewhere there’s none left for their future endeavors.

I’m far from the only person whose career exhibits these symptoms, although my case does seem to be extreme. I do feel better knowing that my good show karma is somewhere, benefiting my friends and a show I love, which occasionally provides me some income, too. And if you’ve ever wondered how it’s possible for a show to run 25+ years, this is how it will be done. You heard it here first.


September 3, 2007

My Favorite Cartoon Ever

I call this: theatre — Posted by KP @ 10:19 pm

I clipped this out of The New Yorker sometime in the early-to-mid ’90s and have held onto it ever since. I just recently rediscovered it and scanned it, cause I’m surprised it’s stayed in my life in non-digital format this long.


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